My birthday is November 18.  After I turned 21, I stopped looking foreward to birthdays.  For years, I didn’t celebrate them because I had this theory — "You don’t any have birthdays, you don’t get any older".  Well, that never sit well with my family.  They still insisted on cards and phone calls and all of that stuff.  This years is different, however.  I’m not excited about my birthday and am having trouble sleeping, which is a very nice kind of stress.

Horses And Nightmares

I used to have a huge collection of model horses, which I started back in 1974.  By huge, I mean over 1000.  And I named them all.  When I knew I was moving to England, I sold a lot off, gave some away and some were stolen, and some perished in a fire.  My Mom kept a grand total of five in her basement, which were out waiting for me when I had to return to America after my English misadventure.

I don’t have the intension of ever building another collection up to the volume it was ten years ago.  The collection owns you when it is that big.  But I do miss having the friendly eyes and beautiful horse shaped objects about my room.  And, in the years since I was in England, model horse colecting has become a big hobby.  When I was a kid, I couldn’t find anyone else who collected — now they’re all over the place (at least, in my area around Philly).

NOW the fun happens when I’m too old and too poor to enjoy it!  Looking at my few model horses, I can’t help but see missed opportunites and lost dreams of my youth.  That is not a very nice kind of stress.

Enter Mom, Stage Right

My Mom likes to read the local papers as well as the Philadelphia Inquirer and plots things.  A couple of nights ago, she asked me if I wanted to go shopping for Breyers (my favorite brand of model horses) on my birthday.  I said, "What?"  and she showed me an add she found in the paper.

Just by sheer coincidence, there is going to be a "Breyer Fun Day" with giveaways, games and sales a half hour away from where we live on the afternoon of November 18.

For the first time in years (I’m not telling you how many), I am looking foreward to my birthday so much it’s hard to settle down and sleep!  I keep wondering about what Breyers are going to be at the store and keep wandering off to Breyer’s website to see the latest catalog…when I’m supposed to be working.  That’s one of the disadvantages of working from home — you are the boss and can usually win argumanets with yourself.

Although most stress needs to be countered — and you wind up being the stronger for it — anticipating a special event is a very nice kind of stress.  I feel like I’m a kid again.

And it’s not really the promise that Mom is buying me great stuff — it’s more that she bothered to remember some feelings that I’d forgotten.

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