"I want a new drug." — Huey Lewis & The News
Chronic pain is bad enough, but then you have to deal with taking new medicines. For example, I have migraines. I get them about once a week, more or less. And let me tell you, contrary to the belief that everything that happens to you is a blessing from God, I really do NOT feel blessed. My doctor is trying a little pill parade of new drugs in order to banish the migraines into the maelstrom of chaos from whence they came. It’s stressful taking new medication, because you really dread that moment when you realize this is not the drug for you. You never know when that moment is going to hit. And yet, when the moment comes, it’s never as bad as you think it’s going to be. It’s a metaphor for dealing with life, isn’t it?
How’s It Going So Far, Rena?
So far, it’s not going so well. Either I feel too bad…or I feel like I couldn’t care less about anything, if you know what I mean. First, I was on a beta-blocker called proplanalol. This is a high-blood pressure medication that (as a side effect) often lessens the frequency of migraine attacks. Well, for other people, but not for me. I got very ill in ways I really don’t want to describe here.
So, now I’m on verapamil (which I like to call "velociraptor.") This is another kind of heart pressure medication called a calcium channel blocker. (Boy — a lot of things in my body apparently need to be blocked). You should read the side effects for this stuff. It’s a hoot. Here we go:
"Tell your doctor immediately if these rare but serious side effects occur: swelling of the ankles/feet, shortness or breath, persistent fatigue, fast/irregular/very slow heartbeat, unusual dreams, mental/mood changes, decreased sexual ability/desire, fainting."
Wow. That sounds like me on a good day! (Although I do wonder how I’m supposed to contact my doctor while I’ve fainted. Mental telepathy, maybe?)
You Gotta Laugh
Because you know you’re on a new medicine, you’re paying more attention to tiny details of how you are doing than you ever have before. You’re just ready to bolt to the phone over the slightest condition. ("Wait. I breathed in and out. Does that mean I’m having a bad reaction to the new medication?") This hypervigilence will stress you out unnecessarily. Just try to find the humor in the situation and try to live life as normally as possible.
That being said, I think I just saw my Mom have a whispered conversation on the phone with someone while eyeing me. Or perhaps that was an unusual dream.
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