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Dec 04 2007

Handling Women With PMS/PMT

Russian toy terrierIn America, it’s called Pre-Menstrual Syndrome.  In England, it’s called Pre-Menstrual Tension.  But no matter where you go in the world, women who experience it call it "AAAHHHH!!!!"  And the men around them are generally clueless as to how to handle women with PMS/PMT.  It’s really not too difficult.  Just take a deep breath, come out from your hiding place and follow these tips and you (yes, you) can handle women with PMS/PMT.  And women who are not currently going through PMS/PMT should look over this as a refresher course.  Since an average of 80% of fertile women gets PMS/PMT, you will not be able to avoid bumping into someone with it.

Pain Is Pain

Now, you must have had pain at some point in your life, unless you have a terrible medical condition like CIPA (Congenital Insensivity to Pain and Anhidrosis).  You must remember what it is like to have pain.  Now, you probably have had pain at times when you had to go to school, go to work, or still try to carry out your day even though you are in pain.  The pain leads to stress, which leads to even more pain, doesn’t it?

That is what it’s like for a woman with PMS/PMT.  Most women with PMS/PMT do have annoying physical symptoms like cramps, bloating, diarrhea, headache, migraine, fever, shakiness and strong cravings for either salty or sweet foods.  You also can get anxiety, which may or may not lead to even more physical pain.  But at this time, it is hard for a woman to concentrate.  Ever not get much sleep for a few nights in a row?  It’s hard to keep your mind on what you are doing, isn’t it?

Be Willing To Repeat Yourself

You don’t need to strap on a Kevlar vest in order to handle women with PMS/PMT.  Despite popular myth, women with PMs/PMT are not homicidal maniacs.  They can still function in civilized society.  But be aware that you may have to repeat yourself, remind them to do something or have them give you a frozen or haunted look.  Just let it roll off you like water off a duck’s back.  They will not snap and suddenly attack you.  They are stressed out and trying to do the best they can. 

Stay Calm, Not Condescending

The worst thing you can do to a woman with PMS/PMT is to say, "Oh, I understand.  You’re getting your period, aren’t you?  You can’t help it."  This is condescending.  It’s like saying, "You can’t help yourself.  You have testosterone.  I understand."  This implies that we are helpless little damsels in distress.  Far from it.  We are dragon tamers, carrying on despite raging hormones.

Just don’t act frightened around a pre-menstrual woman – like dogs and horses, we can smell fear during this time of heightened senses and we will be offended by  the smell of fear sooner or later.  Just act calm, breathe regularly and make deliberate movements and nod a lot.  Being calm is a great way to handle a woman with PMS/PMT.

Inside A PMS Mind

"I really hate my period and everything having to do with it, especially my monthly PMS migraine.   My Mom had a life-saving hysterectomy years ago, and she smiles smugly whenever I complain about my period.  The cat is spayed.  The dog is spayed.  I want to be spayed.  If hysterectomies were free, I’d be first in line!"

These are the kind of thoughts that go through a woman’s head during PMS/PMT.  Now that you know what internal chatter we have to deal with, you can help better understand us.

Hope this helps.

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